Applefritter: The Nation

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Tom Owad's picture
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I know some people who would

I know some people who would dearly love to be involved in something like that. They've even got decent money, but I'm guessing the purchase price of that land is bigger than the GDP of several nations. Wink

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Reverend Darkness's picture
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Hmm...

Considering that the Dallas/Ft. Worth metroplex is about 9000 square miles, and that land is about 1500, it's a far cry from having "your own country" (at least to a Texan). Hell, the King Ranch is that big all by itself.

I might be able to find some prime West Texas land for a far cry cheaper Wink

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iantm's picture
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Couldn't we just ...

overtake the uninhabited wasteland that lies between Philadelphia and Pittsburgh, PA and proclaim ourselves the Apple fritter nation. Anything from Westmoreland county on the west side to Lancaster county on the east side. Let Tom run the whole thing from his area, and we're good! That being said, PA's cultural clash can be resolved with this area, as Western PA can become West Pennsylvania, and Eastern PA can be still be called Pennsylvania. Tom, I'll even help you overtake the western half of this area, provided that I can be the western territory's governor.

I keed about calling central PA uninhabited wasteland. I've only ever lived on one end of the state at any time. Bucks county during my childhood, and now Allegheny county after living in Florida for a few years.

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gobabushka's picture
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i say tht we join forces with

i say tht we join forces with the 68kMLA and take over this land in PA!!!

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Tom Owad's picture
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Re: Hmm...

Reverend Darkness wrote:

I might be able to find some prime West Texas land for a far cry cheaper Wink

It seems the only large lots of land left are either in deserts or jungles.

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davintosh's picture
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Seems to me...

... that the Amazon basin regularly floods. This particular parcel of land may not be one of the flood-prone areas, but even so, with critters like the Piranha and the Candiru -- which has a really nasty propensity to do really nasty things to people -- I'd think twice about relocating to the Amazon basin, no matter how many Mac-ophiles there might be.

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Tom Owad's picture
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solution

Our first industry will be Candiru-proof underwear.

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doug-doug the mighty's picture
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Re: solution - an even better one...

Tom Owad wrote:

Our first industry will be Candiru-proof underwear.

[crinkling sound of tin foil hat coming off the shelf and being placed on top of pointy little head]
ok. this is what we do:

    [1] Secure the land and decalre ourselve a new nation.
    [2] Declare our new nation's name to be 'New Sarnia'.
    [3] Declare Tom Owad sun-god of New Sarnia.
    [4] Clear-cut a huge tract of land and have the world's biggest bonfire/toga party.
    [5] Pave the entire tract of land to a. cover the mess from the party (so we do not have to clean it up) and b. 'cuz grass may one day start to grow and no body is going to want to mow it so let's pave it while we're thinking about it.
    [6] Build a couple of shanties to serve as a base of operations.
    [7] Establish a 419 operation to raise money for our military campaign.
    [8] Using the 68k MLA as our military service, declare war on The Conch Republic because they are small enough that we could probably take them.
    [9] Feast on Margarittas and Cheesburgers for the rest of our natural born days.
    [10] Start fishing the Candiru and selling them on the internet as a component of sushi.
    [11] Buy new Macs for all Tom's subjects from the profits of the 419 gig and what ever the sushi scam pulls in. A Mac in every shack!
[\crinkling sound of tin foil hat beng removed and being placed back on shelf next to my collection of 'magic-sniffy markers that smell so good' and my copy of the movie 'Superman III']

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iantm's picture
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For funding ...

Couldn't we just write a virus that deposits fractions of a cent from every transaction into our big bank account and install it on the bank computer? Like what they did in Superman III. That was a pretty good movie, come to think of it. Wink

I still say we should take over the uninhabited central portion of Pennsylvania though. All we need for success there is to put together a zombie creating virus that only spreads through bites, hole up in the Monroeville Mall or the Winchester for a while, and then start taking out the newly created zombies one by one. It could be argued that this would be a good way to take over the world though. Killing off all those zombies would be a problem, as they would have to be neutralized by removing the head or destroying the brain.

Just my $.02

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FunnymanSE30's picture
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Re: For funding ...

iantm wrote:

Couldn't we just write a virus that deposits fractions of a cent from every transaction into our big bank account and install it on the bank computer? Like what they did in Superman III. That was a pretty good movie, come to think of it. Wink

That was also attempted in the 1999 movie "Office Space"

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Reverend Darkness's picture
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Re: solution - an even better one...

doug-doug the mighty wrote:

[9] Feast on Margarittas and Cheesburgers for the rest of our natural born days.

Yep.. all 112 of them... Wink

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Reverend Darkness's picture
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Re: Hmm...

Tom Owad wrote:

It seems the only large lots of land left are either in deserts or jungles.

It really depends on which part of West Texas you get. You can have desert, mountains, or high plains forest, take yer pick.

I guess the only problem would be the lack of wild animals that can kill you. Even the scorpions are tame.

Yeah, nevermind... It was a bad idea... Wink

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You'd have to worry about coa

You'd have to worry about coal fires if you go for central PA, though. Take over Greenland!

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iantm's picture
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Re: You'd have to worry about coa

moosemanmoo wrote:

You'd have to worry about coal fires if you go for central PA, though. Take over Greenland!

This is why I'm suggesting central PA. Nobody would expect it! That, and we can operate out of Centralia, and mobilize from there. Since it's a ghost town, nobody will even know that we are there!

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gobabushka's picture
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so when do we move in???

so when do we move in???

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Tom Owad's picture
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Re: You'd have to worry about coa

iantm wrote:

This is why I'm suggesting central PA. Nobody would expect it! That, and we can operate out of Centralia, and mobilize from there. Since it's a ghost town, nobody will even know that we are there!

There are still a few houses left (and good for them) in Centralia, and lots of tourists, too. But if you're looking for a ghost town that might need some cleaning up...

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